If I Were A Boy - Beyoncé

<< Fellow veeboxers, you are in for a treat. It’s a Beyoncé triple-header! It’s the only place where you can take the showboating broad down a peg, three times over, free of charge! Why, you may ask, because she’s already put out five videos for one goddamn album, and is planning to release another. And if you haven’t noticed, they are all in black and white and trying really hard to be meaningful. Frankly, we can’t decide which one is the worst, so we’ll just show you all of them. >>

First up is her video (more like short indie film) “If I Were a Boy,” where she delves deep into the idiosyncrasy of contemporary society’s double standards that is gender roles… Just kidding, she wastes our time trying to convince us that she’s the best actress of our time by making a video that is basically a video intro to the hit TV show Cheaters. We don’t want to spoil this awesome piece of art for you, but it’s pretty much a Benjamin Button meet-in-the-middle type video with an M. Night Shyamalan ending that really makes you think. Think how hard it is for Beyoncé now that she has more money than ever, and is, not to mention, married… so like what the hell? I love how at the beginning of the video, she puts on her police hat in her house only to take it off three steps later, when she gets in the cruiser. I also like the single tear shed at the end of the video that happens right after they cut to the shot, so you know they just put eye drops in there. I believe the emotion there, though, for sure. I’m just glad my life isn’t as hard as hers. It’s sad, really.

Album: I Am… Sasha Fierce
Label: Columbia
Release Date: October 14 2008

If I Were A Boy Lyrics:

If I were a boy even just for a day
I’d roll out of bed in the morning
And throw on what I wanted
And go drink beer with the guys

And chase after girls
I’d kick it with who I wanted
And I’d never get confronted for it
‘Cause they stick up for me

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man

I’d listen to her
‘Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
‘Cause he’s taking you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

If I were a boy
I would turn off my phone
Tell everyone it’s broken
So they’d think that I was sleeping alone

I’d put myself first
And make the rules as I go
‘Cause I know that she’d be faithful
Waiting for me to come home, to come home

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man

I’d listen to her
‘Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
‘Cause he’s taking you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

It’s a little too late for you to come back
Say it’s just a mistake
Think I’d forgive you like that
If you thought I would wait for you
You thought wrong

But you’re just a boy
You don’t understand
And you don’t understand, oh
How it feels to love a girl
Someday you wish you were a better man

You don’t listen to her
You don’t care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
‘Cause you’re taking her for granted
And everything you had got destroyed
But you’re just a boy