Diva - Beyoncé

<< Fellow veeboxers, you are in for a treat. It’s a Beyoncé triple-header! It’s the only place where you can take the showboating broad down a peg, three times over, free of charge! Why, you may ask, because she’s already put out five videos for one goddamn album, and is planning to release another. And if you haven’t noticed, they are all in black and white and trying really hard to be meaningful. Frankly, we can’t decide which one is the worst, so we’ll just show you all of them. >>

You know those speeches that begin with, “the word important is thrown around all too often these days, but…” ? And you know how the people who start things off that way they are self-righteous douchebags who are destined to fail at life? Well, here you have the music video equivalent with Beyoncé’s “Diva.” Not only is it trying too hard to be art for the sake of art, it is failing. You can’t call yourself Sasha Fierce, write a song about how you’re a diva, make a video where you dance around like some fucked-up marionette, and not have people hate you. It’s no wonder, they had to kick the two what’s-her-faces out of Destiny’s Child - Beyoncé’s ego combined with her enormous ass didn’t leave much room. Do I even have to draw attention to how stupid her friggin’ sunglasses are in this video? Or how funny it is that she now has video hoes dancing back up for her to make her look like not so much of a crazy bitch? Like, really, you had to have a fan made of dolla bills in your music video? And you had to stand next to golden mannequins and make yourself look greasy as fuck to fit in? You’re going to need a hell of a lot of that L’Oreal crap you’re always hocking on TV to fix that mess. We get it, you have more money than us and you’re far more talented than any of us too. Thanks. Bitch.

Album: I Am… Sasha Fierce
Label: Columbia
Release Date: March 3 2009

Diva Lyrics:

I’m a, a diva, hey
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, hey
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, hey
I’m a, I’m a, a diva

I’m a, I’m a, a diva, hey
I’m a, I’m a, a diva
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, hey
I’m a, I’m a

Na, na, na, diva is a female version of a hustla
Of a hustla, of a, of a hustla
Na, na, na, diva is a female version of a hustla
Of a hustla, of a, of a hustla

Stop the track, let me state facts
I told you give me a minute and I’ll be right back
Fifty million round the world
And they said that I couldn’t get it

I done got so sick and filthy with Benji’s, I can’t spend
How you gone be talkin’ shit?
You act like I just got up in it
Been the number one diva in this game for a minute

I know you read the paper
The one that they call a queen
Every radio round the world know me
‘Cause that’s where I be

I’m a, a diva, hey
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, hey
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, hey
I’m a, I’m a, a diva

I’m a, I’m a, a diva, hey
I’m a, I’m a, a diva
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, hey
I’m a, I’m a

Na, na, na, diva is a female version of a hustla
Of a hustla, of a, of a hustla
Na, na, na, diva is a female version of a hustla
Of a hustla, of a, of a hustla

When he pull up, wanna pop my hood up
Bet he better have a six pack in the cooler
Getting money, divas getting money
If you ain’t getting money then you ain’t got nothing for me

Tell me somethin’ where your boss at?
Where my ladies up in there that like to talk back
I wanna see ya, I’d like to meet cha
What you said, she ain’t no diva

Na, na, na, diva is a female version of a hustla
Of a hustla, of a, of a hustla
Na, na, na, diva is a female version of a hustla
Of a hustla, of a, of a hustla

Since fifteen in my stilettos been struttin’ in this game
What’s your age? Was the question they asked when I hit the stage
I’m a diva, best believe her, you see her, she getting paid
She ain’t callin’ him to greet her, don’t need him, her bed’s made

This is a stick up, stick up
I need them bags, uh, that money
A stick up, stick up
You see them ask, where that money?

All my ladies get it up
I see you, I do the same
Take it to another level
No passengers on my plane

I’m a, a diva, hey
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, hey
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, hey
I’m a, I’m a, a diva

This is a stick, up stick up
I need them bags, uh, that money
Stick up, stick up
You see them ask where that money

Na, na, na, diva is a female version of a hustla
Of a hustla, of a, of a hustla
Na, na, na, diva is a female version of a hustla
Of a hustla, of a, of a hustla

I’m a, a diva, I’m a, I’m a, a diva
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, I’m a, I’m a, a diva
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, I’m a, I’m a, a diva
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, I’m a, I’m a, a diva

I’m a, I’m a, a diva, I’m a, I’m a, a diva
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, I’m a, I’m a, a diva
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, I’m a, I’m a, a diva
I’m a, I’m a, a diva, I’m a, I’m a, a diva, hey